Soul mate: A Gift from God

"I have never been in a relationship (or true relationship) till the time I met him/her. I saw him/her first time and there was a spark within me somewhere that ignited a different kind of feeling that I had never felt. Positive vibes were emerging from him/her that I was able to sense and feel, and a charisma was developed around me. I felt like, I know him/her since ages. S/he was the one who was here for me." I believe, all of you have been felt the same once in your lifetime. Is that feeling because of soul urge? Is this how we react when we meet our soul mate? What is soul mate? I am trying to find out the definition of the term and pertaining questions spiritually and logically for last couple of weeks. I found few answers that I want to share with you through this post. Different brains thinks differently, so it is quite natural that I could create controversies in this post.

In my thought, a soul mate is finding your soul's counterpart. Finding someone who makes you feel good about yourself. Caring about someone else more than you care about yourself. Someone who makes you feel like the best is yet to come. Soul mate is an eternal partner made and gifted by God.

I believe that soul mates are two souls from a previous life, re-fixing because they were meant to be together in a love or any other strong relationship. Though, I recently understood that even though this can be the case, it can also simply be two souls from a previous life getting connected again for the purpose of resolving previous issues, as well as to grow, teach, and learn from one another. So, soul mate can be any one who has a strong binding with you. Up until recently, I believed that my soul mate was someone with whom I have this intense and enigmatically strong connection that was felt by both of us (and sensed by others as well). I interpreted this to mean that we were meant to be together forever in this lifetime. Being together specifies here that our souls will be together even we are physically far apart. You can treat this as a flame burning continuously at distance that is visible always but you cannot feel the heat, and as you come closer you start feeling the heat. Once you have that sense of heat, whenever you see the flame, you feel the heat every time without getting closer to the flame.

For soul mates, the depth of Love for the person is such that every moment is a torture if s/he is apart. The heart aches when s/he is not with you. Let me clear it more that your heart can get ached for your love, spouse, frineds, or any family member. I never thought it was possible to literally feel my heart aches over someone, but that is true once your soul mate is not with you. I have realized many time recently and I guess if you've never been with your soul mate, it's hard to understand but believe me it happens.

For true love, perhaps laws of attraction works well and seems that both the persons will have been met time and time again life after life, and we meet that person again in future. Is it right to say "OH, it's my soul mate (in that we've known each other before) and let's be one this time." But, unfortunately, doesn’t get together in this life, and still feel it's best to, although the connection, to not actually be together. Must be God is thinking in a different way.
True soul mates can simply become one at any given time in their light body. Soul mates are sanctified with extraordinary gifts to support and maintain their celestial relationship for the benefit of conception. They can communicate through telepathy, and knowing at any given time the needs of the eternal partner and being a living medicine for the partner. The partner can get treated as the one and only true eternal spouse or binding, given by God and the relationship is remained eternal. I would like to say that the eternal relationship is celestial in nature.

However, we run naturally and because of that find our soul mate in life after life with the possibility of not getting one. But there is an end, and this would get happened in one life. I wish that everyone would get his or her soul mate in this life only.

Essence of Relationship

Being a human, I sometimes wonder if things and persons wouldn’t have been associated with each other then what would get happened. There were no relationships, bonding, obligations, and attachment. But, were we born not to be dependent or to be associated with others. When I try to find answer of this question, I always perceive that a living being cannot survive without being associated or linked with other living beings or any objects.

Relationship can be of any type, personal, business, professional etc. In my thought relationship is built due to the need. All living beings depend on someone for something. Can every one build his or her house? Can you service your car? Answer will be No, but the resources are there. People who they are trained in that field are able to mould these resources into product that others need. I am simply trying to say that, all human beings are talented and got the talent as a gift. We have these talents so that we can use them to serve one another. Few people are good in repairing cars, heeling others, comforting others, helping you find your True Love. The reason is we cannot do it all on our own. Truth is that the doctors also get sick and visit other doctors.

I talked something nonsense in the above paragraph but I have written this paragraph to explain that there is a need behind every relationship. And If I think one step ahead and crossed the material, I found that we all are here to build a better relationship with all who they are around us else we will be individually experiencing our own joys, sorrows and love. But, the relationship that brings the most happiness and the one you pursue are entirely different things. If any relationship does not work well, there must be a reason.

A couple that find successful relationship or marriage, put in what are the things they trust to be the right thing rather what they wish for. A winning relationship depends on the idea of not giving up trying right things to maintain the health of the relationship. We should keep revisiting the facts of healthy and happy relationship, and use it until it yelled result. It is quite often that people are willing to find love and happiness but are not ready to spend time so they reconcile with the Love at first sight. Shortly they find that the person is not so great and the relationship turned into break-up. Fortunately, resource to help each man, woman or couples are already there. We as human beings should have the inclination to try and implement to get the best result out. We should try to use the available resources at the level best and help our partner to develop a cozy and comfortable environment for each other.

The most common words I heard for relationship is, Relationships should work. There is an admired saying-if you are doing something and if it doesn’t work, try a new approach. I think this is the only spirit of relationship. I believe, most common reason for a relationship to get failed is people find the person they want to be with and that is all they do care and love about. This approach to finding love is little bit risky because relationship is about two people who go with. Moreover, by this way the relationship bowed to one sided. This is the woman or man I want and that is it, is one sided. When you select a person you want, you may find you’re self-doing too much in the significance of love. This might cause the love to get power over you because the love knows- you want him or her so you are willing to do as he or she wants. You will find too many men and women who have given all they can and got dumped for another person. You can stop repeating the same fault only if you do admit that there is something you are doing that is not accurate.

However if you look for a relationship that is even- the love, affection, respect in the relationship will be given equally. The very meaning of essence of relationship is finding a relationship that is healthy and will work for both you and the other person. If you want to find relationship that will work ones and for all, you have to find you out of you. When it comes to finding that special someone, go about it the right way. Never forget that the word, it is SPECIAL not just any one pursue your love life the right way.

You are not here to have failed relationships unless you made that choice.

Feedbacks-Good or Bad

For last couple of weeks, a thought was residing somewhere in my Mind, what is feedback? How it works? Does feedback really help to grow or discourage? What is the difference in feedback and criticism? And lots of other related questions were not allowing me to think any other aspect of life. So, I am sitting at home and writing this post to give a shape to my thoughts.


What is the origin of the term Feedback? I went through various journals, and found that the term Feedback first appeared in the 1920's and grew out of the broadcasting industry. When the volume of a microphone is set incorrectly, unpleasant squawking sounds will result. Since the sounds that enter a microphone are referred to as feeds, it followed that the unpleasant sounds heard after the feeds would be called feedback. It took several decades for the term to be borrowed and used, refer to the reaction one has to information, a situation or a relationship. So the origin is electric and current usage is eclectic.


Now, I am a firm believer that receiving and giving feedback is an essential part of life. It helps you improve your work style, strengthen your bonding with your loved ones, and set a next milestone in any area of life. Feedbacks help you understand where you are- and where you have to reach. It gives you an insight of gap in knowledge, skills, and moral behavior. I am not counting the fathoms of feedback in this post, but limiting myself to Positive-Negative Feedbacks & Criticism.


Lets discuss the Positive feedback first. Positive feedback consists of praise, appreciation, and the term More than Enough. This is a normal human tendency that if someone does anything remarkable as per his/her parameters, wants to get appreciated. You can take example of any thing. If some one feels that s/he looks good in Black then s/he appreciates himself in mirror first and gives first positive feedback to him or her. I am writing this post and I immediately gave a positive feedback to the second paragraph as that was based on my research and I had invested couple of hours to dig this information out. But, when you are exposed to others and a person genuinely says, you look good in Black, this is called true positive feedback. You can receive positive feedbacks for impressive dressing sense, effective communication skills, flawless work style, remarkable PR skills etc. But being addicted for positive feedback can discourage a person in longer run. Lack of positive feedback can start crashing people those are addicted only to positive feedback.

Consider a stereotypical scenario of a couple who has been together for many more years. Ms. begins to feel that Mr. doesn’t love her or think she’s pretty simply because he has stopped saying the positive words. The positive feedback, at early stage of relationship, built her confidence up SO high that when the words stopped, she came crashing down, bewildered and even wondering what she’s doing wrong. The same could be said of children, co-workers, and just about anyone you could name. Children often become reluctant because they don’t feel appreciated. Co-workers and friends get to the point that they quit trying because nothing they do is ever “good enough.” I think, one should open his/her ears for positive feedback but always ready for the situation when the praising words could get stopped. In this case, a thorough self-analysis is highly required or the time has arrived to rejuvenate the style.


Now come to the Negative feedback. In general, people are not ready to receive negative feedback as it shows that the person is lagging in an area. Couple of weeks back, I shot e-mail to client keeping my Boss in CC list. My boss called me up and told that the mail could have been written in more effective way, and I was not ready to accept his words rather defending me hard by giving excuses. When I came back at my workstation and looked at the mail again, I found he was right. There is always a scope of improvement. In my opinion, negative feedback should be received without making comments or statements rather asking questions to clarify the things because negative feedbacks help you grow.

In contrast, it is important how you are giving a negative feedback to others. The only thing more dangerous than a lack of positive feedback is a steady stream of negative feedback. When a spouse, daughter, son, friend, co-worker, etc. only hears negative comments – they begin to believe the words and come to believe that they are as worthless as the words say they are. And when someone believes the worst about themself, they stop even trying. However, if they get positive feedback – even if it’s for the smallest possible thing – their confidence and self worth begin to grow. So, be careful at the time of giving negative feedbacks.


Criticism-last but not the least. There is a thin line difference in Negative feedback and Criticism. In my opinion, criticism is something when your pitfalls are discussed at your back. The person(s) who is (are) criticizing you, is (are) discussing your pit falls to others especially when you are not present. One can criticize you by writing as well. A negative feedback turned to criticism when things are written about your pit falls and sent to every one other than you. I believe, people start criticizing when they don’t have enough strength to give negative feedback.


So, stop criticizing and start giving/receiving feedbacks for mutual development and growth in work, life, and relationship.